Find Happiness 21: How to Make Being Happy a Habit

Being happy all the time is very much a matter of habit. If you don’t have the habit, it is easy to create it.

Let us first define “being happy”.

I-wantYou are unhappy, generally speaking, when you do not have something that you wished you had. Want-related thoughts make you restless and dissatisfied.

But suppose it is the person across the street who is disturbed by a want. You would not be restless and dissatisfied because it is not you who has the want.

Well, surprise: all these years when you were disturbed by wants, it wasn’t “you” who had the wants.

I-want2 It was your mind that had the wants. You are merely aware of your mind. You are a still, motionless witness to it. The mind is an object, and you are watching it.

But do not take my word for it, verify this arrangement for yourself. The next time a thought strikes you, try and put your finger on who was aware of the thought. Once you have located that “who”, dwell in the “who” for a while. Rinse and repeat; you will realize that this “who” is absolutely still and peaceful, and is watching your thoughts like a person in a theater watching a movie (your mind is the movie).

What you have to do is reside in this “who” all the time while being constantly and peacefully aware of all your thoughts. When your thoughts decide that you should do something (just as they have in the past), spur your body on to perform that action.

In the eyes of the outside world, you will be going about your life as usual; inside, you will be watching your mind and body going about your life as usual, only “you” will be absolutely peaceful and undisturbed.

mobile But… you have to remember to be this way throughout the day. Here is a method for doing that: set alarms in your mobile phone to remind you every two hours to “identify with the motionless witness”, and set these alarms to repeat daily over several weeks. With practice you will find that when the alarm rings, you will already be the motionless witness. How do I know? Because it is happening to me!

So give it a whirl… first find the “who” that is aware of your thoughts, then be that “who” throughout the day. START NOW!

To your peaceful life,

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Find Happiness 19: Meditation: Are you Botching it Up?

meditation2-250 Meditation, as popularly conceived, is similar to prayer in a lot of respects. It entails closing your eyes, being in a special location, and performing it during a portion of the day. If you are talking about deep meditation (aka soul-searching), then all those descriptors are appropriate. But should the rest of your day be meditation-free?

No Way!!!

Meditation, if done with the correct attitude, connects you with the rest of the Universe. This connection frequently happens during deep meditation, and over several sessions. The door to the rest of the Universe slowly opens; if you are dedicated enough, have faith in where the meditation is taking you, and are serious about willingly surrendering to the unimaginable power of the Universe, you will have the courage to step into that door.

Once in the door, you will realize that this is your peaceful, blissful home; this is where you live, and from where you have been looking out of the window your whole life, forgetting that you are at home in the first place. Most recently you’ve even been looking out of the window trying to find home 🙂

So once you find your peaceful home, what do you do? Start looking out of the window again because your 15 or so minutes of daily meditation are over? And again forget that you are actually at home? HECK NO!!

happy -beach250 Once you are out of deep, eyes-closed meditation, you have to be ‘at home’ the rest of the time as well. Without your eyes closed, without being on your meditation mat and without withdrawing from routine activities. You should be a motionless witness to all your thoughts and sensations, acting in accordance with what your mind decides. You will do all the things you normally do, only you will be quietly watching your mind and body as they go about their routine tasks. In a way, you will be watching the movie of your life.

The takeaway: Once your sit-down meditation is over, spend every moment of the remaining day in open-eyes meditation.

As my spiritual teacher and very close friend Swami Suddhananda has always said, you should be…

living in meditation.


To your peaceful, enhanced life,

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Find Happiness 9: How to Detach Yourself from Your Thoughts

dreamstime_9984107flock Imagine you’re sitting on a meadow looking at the sky and a flock of birds flies slowly across your field of vision. 

You watch the birds enter your view, keep watching as they cross it and then exit it.

There’s you, and there’s the birds. No question about that, right? You certainly don’t feel that the birds are part of you. They’re objects and you’re watching them. That’s VERY clear.

You might not realize it, but your thought process is remarkably similar…


Your thoughts are passing by in front of you and you’re only watching them. They’re objects, just like the birds. They are not you. They are the products of your brain.

A thought like, “I’m depressed” or “I’m so happy” is just like one of those birds. So is “What a lousy life I’m leading” or “Life is so cool!”


They’re all like those birds, and you’re watching them.

But all these days you felt those thoughts were “you.”


So how do you experience that you are separate from your thoughts and just watching them? Easy. 

  • Sit quietly somewhere, close your eyes and watch what’s going on in your head. As soon as you “think” something, try and locate the answer to the question, “Who was aware of that thought?” The answer is the basic “you”, and the result will be that you separate “yourself” from that thought.
  • Perform this process  on a daily basis on several thoughts (10 minutes a day will do). Gradually you will realize you are separate from all your thoughts; you will in other words realize that they are objects and you are an observer. Since emotions are nothing but thoughts, you separate yourself from them too. Since the basic “you” is separate from your emotions, it feels no sadness, happiness, frustration or any other emotions.

Sound dull? Not really. On the other hand, bereft of thoughts/emotions of all kinds, you are actually at perfect peace.

Please be aware that at no point am I saying that you should suppress your thoughts. Your thoughts should certainly keep flowing, only you should watch them like you watched those birds fly over your field.


This is the secret to being peaceful at all times. Try it, it really works!


To your peaceful life,

Want to put your finger right on your inner peace?
Submit your first name and email address, I'll send you full instructions in four installments for free.
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