First off, what do I mean by “Be Peaceful”? I mean a state of mind where there is no agitation, no stress, no anxiety… something analogous to the surface of a placid lake.
And by “No Matter What”, I mean even in these example circumstances:
- Someone is yelling and insulting you
- You are confronted by an armed robber
- Someone very close to you dies
- Someone does something that goes against one of your important principles
- A natural disaster is in progress
The first step is to realize that you are different from your thoughts. This may not happen immediately, but will definitely happen with continual practice. 10 minutes a day is all it takes.
The upshot of realizing you are separate from your thoughts is being able to quietly watch them.
So let’s consider the thoughts that will be running through your mind in one of the above circumstances.
Let’s take the first one (believe me, almost every person on the planet has been there!)… let’s say you and your partner are having a heated argument, and your partner is slamming you with f’s, b’s and s’s.
Instead of screaming back impetuously, separate yourself from your thoughts and watch them. You’ll probably see thoughts like, “Who does s/he think s/he is?!!” or “s/he’s not giving me the respect I’m due” or “I want to slap this person hard”…
But just keep watching them. This prevents you from getting angry and enables you to keep thinking with a clear head. You might want to say to your partner, “Listen, we should certainly talk about this but later, I will myself bring it up.” Then smile and walk away politely.
Take note that the key principle here is to watch your thoughts during the event and make sure you don’t lose your cool. You may also want to think that your partner is just doing her/him thing by screaming, and that you can always buttonhole her/him later when s/he’s in a better frame of mind.
The takeaways:
- Spend 10 minutes a day to realize that you are separate from your thoughts
- Use this separation to keep a cool head during events that are typically stressful.
Good luck, message me if you have questions!
